We all experience moments when life feels heavy—whether from past mistakes, missed opportunities, or situations where others have wronged us. It’s easy to get caught up replaying old scenarios in our heads, holding onto regret or resentment, and feeling weighed down by what went wrong. But life doesn’t have to be defined by those moments. When things go off course, whether by someone else’s actions or your own mistakes, it’s time to hit the reset button.
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Why Do We Rehash the Past?
Before we talk about hitting reset, let’s address something almost all of us do—rehashing the past. Why is it so hard to let go, even when we know it’s not serving us? Our minds tend to cling to the familiar, even when it’s painful. Reliving past mistakes or betrayals gives us a false sense of control, as if by mentally replaying those moments, we can somehow fix them.
But there’s another reason: people often find comfort in the attention they receive when sharing their struggles. When we dwell on our hurts or regrets, we tend to get soothing words from others—sympathy, validation, and support. And let’s be honest, that feels good. We can become attached to that comforting attention, using it as a way to avoid truly healing and moving forward. Instead of wiping the slate clean, we linger on the hurt because it brings us temporary relief.
The problem with this is that by staying attached to past hurts, we stop ourselves from growing. We stay stuck in the cycle of rehashing, without ever allowing ourselves to step forward into the freedom of letting go.
Letting Go When Others Wrong You (and When You Regret Your Own Actions)
Sometimes the wrongs that we carry aren’t just minor disagreements or mistakes. Having been in a toxic and abusive relationship, I know firsthand how deep those scars can go. Acknowledging how hurtful and frustrating it was is important for healing, but I refused to let that label define me. I didn’t want to carry the weight of being known as “the divorcee” or “the abused ex-wife.” Those labels didn’t tell the full story, nor did they reflect who I am or the life I’m creating moving forward.
In these moments, it’s easy to let the pain define you, but holding onto that identity only keeps you stuck in the past. Similarly, when you make a mistake, it’s easy to fall into self-blame. Reflecting on what went wrong is important, but not if it stops you from moving forward.
Personally, when I face situations where I’ve made a mistake, I think about how I could have handled things differently. I take time to reflect, but I don’t dwell on it. Once I’ve learned the lesson, I let it go and move forward. The same applies when I’m dealing with someone else’s wrongdoing—I refuse to let their actions define my progress. Holding onto that hurt only keeps me stuck, and it’s a waste of time. Forgiveness, for others or for yourself, is a powerful reset button.
Resetting in the Workplace
This idea of hitting reset applies to all areas of life, including work. We’ve all had those days when things don’t go as planned. Maybe a project didn’t land the way you hoped, or you made a mistake in a big meeting. It’s easy to let that frustration bleed into the rest of your day, affecting your mood and productivity. But here’s the thing: you have the power to reset.
When things don’t go right, you can either let the disappointment define the rest of your day or you can hit that reset button, take a deep breath, and decide that it won’t end like that. It’s a choice you make to move forward, not with frustration, but with renewed energy and purpose. By hitting reset, you remind yourself that setbacks don’t determine the outcome—how you choose to respond does.
Letting Go and Learning
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The act of hitting the reset button is about releasing what no longer serves you. Whether it’s a grudge against someone who hurt you, a regret, or even the fear of moving forward, holding onto it only weighs you down. Think of it like carrying around a heavy backpack full of things you no longer need. It’s exhausting, and it keeps you from walking freely.
Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting the lessons you’ve learned—it means not letting them control you. You can reflect on your past without living in it. By hitting the reset button, you give yourself the opportunity to take those lessons with you as you move forward, leaving the unnecessary baggage behind.
Three Simple Ways to Reset
Here are a few practical ways to hit the reset button and shift your mindset:
1. Move Your Body
Physical movement is one of the simplest ways to release tension and hit reset. Whether it’s stretching, going for a walk, or even a quick workout, moving helps release the pent-up energy and negative emotions that build up when we’re stuck in the past. It’s a reminder that you’re not rooted in your mistakes or others’ wrongdoings—you’re capable of moving forward.
2. Change Your Environment
A change of scenery can work wonders for your mindset. Step outside, rearrange your space, or simply move to a different room. Changing your environment helps reset your mind and gain a fresh perspective. Sometimes, the mental shift comes just by stepping out of the place where you’ve been stuck.
3. Focus on Your Breath
When emotions are high and your mind is racing, take a moment to breathe. Slow, deep breaths help calm your nervous system and bring you back to the present. Grounding yourself in the present moment allows you to let go of the mental spiral and reset your thinking.
Moving Forward Without Rehashing
Whether it’s because of someone else’s actions or your own mistakes, don’t let rehashing the past hold you back. Constantly replaying what went wrong may bring temporary attention or comfort, but it’s only stopping you from truly healing and growing. There’s no benefit in reliving the hurt—once you’ve learned the lesson, let it go.
The reset button isn’t about erasing the past. It’s about shifting your focus from regret or hurt to growth. The key is to reflect, learn, and let go. Then, you can step into what’s next with grace and determination—without carrying the weight of past mistakes or betrayals on your shoulders.
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